Deserve & Desire

"FIRST DESERVE THEN DESIRE"

Today, for the first time in my life i hear this famous saying, though it is too late for the person like me who love reading and have a huge bank of such things,
well 'Better Late then Never',
Till the time i encountered this proverb strings of my mind are constantly vibrating,
Suddenly few big questions from my cold bag jump outside and are giving me nightmare in day light.
It's quite difficult to accept that the things which i was desiring from the past several years - i do not deserve them..???
Everyday i was blaming external factors like Destiny, Parents, God (If any), Society etc. for the things i am not getting in my life which i want.

Now, the question of DESERVE arise....
It feels absolutely strange when i found that i am not even getting the things i Deserve completely....
I personally know Dozens of people who told me on one or more occasions about the things i deserve but i am still far from them, even few of my constant critics (including me) agreed on this fact.

One more funny fact is that there are also few things in my life for which i found my self absolutely Deserving but i do not Desire them any.....

What 2 do॥????